another step ?

Assalamualaikum

happy Ramadhan guys !!!!!!!!!!!!


                                 
                                                 

today i'm not typing about Ramadhan. 

last night after sahur and praying  subuh usually i'm go back to sleep. I've dreaming about MR.H  oh yeahhhh.

he's on my list in the last semester until now. haha

he's not kind of man that annoyed me and what I've been grateful is we're coursemates . yehyeh

19/5 is his birthday. i'm so glad i have opportunity to say to him

"happy birthday H" 

in front of our classmates so sad, i hope he notice me. (perasan la kau)

i'm so damn happy that day. we have been in the same class last semester and we rarely talking with each other until now. but the night before his birthday i'm talking to him, of course about our study. 

so, after this i hope we can cooperate in different kind of way

i hope ! i hope ! i hope !

But, from all of that i have to remember my best friend's advice. she said "anak ikan still anak ikan is not your jodoh at all unless either one of  you making another step"

so dear self ! did you want to make another step ? will you be alright if you fail the step ? 

or did you  want to stick with your words "want to meet your soulmates at your favourite place after graduate"

you may think about it okay. don't rush yourself it will make you looks like desperate person. 

Listener

Assalamualaikum 

First thing first, I'm very grateful because my hectic semster is finaaly over just around the corner. Of course it is not over before the final examination 😪. There's a lot thing that i had faced for the past two months u ntil now. Surprisingly this semester showed everbody who really i am. Yeah 😔 I'm not fear to talk in front of 100 people anymore. Sometimes it's feel good and sometimes you feel bad. But I don't give up, daa people makes mistake. This is my first time so, you better remembered what happen when you first time doing it. 

Okay enough for that experience, now all my assignment and presentation ar all done. I'm happy for that. So like usually it's time for me to take time to rest at home. When I'm reaching home I'm always have this mood turn on "tired" I'm very tired from all of this problem because when there's the end of the problem there must be another problem. I hate to be the middle person for the problem. 

It's not because I don't care anymore about my best friends but we're too old to be in this kind of situation, we suppose to support each other not to blame or jealousy with each other. Come on babe !!! If you read this i want we having fun like before okay like our time in high school before.

I'm very sad 😢 Because every time i want to come home jauh jauh uolls boleh bergaduh. Penat tau layan karenah manusia ni, lepas satu satu, habis siapa nak layan perasan aku pulak. Korang je yang ada masalah, just like only u have the serious problem. Me ? Yeah pakar pendengar segala masalah korang. When i tried to speak about my problem what you guys doing ? Pay attention just for a second and then play your dumb phone. It hurts me sometimes. Its true I don't have a boyfriend, scandal or private counsellor to speak to them, sejak dulu i mmg tak pernah cerita masalah in front of my family. 

Because of that, now i never tell a story about my problem or whatever to anybody. It's not woth it. You let me speak but you don't listen. Sometimes you've listen but then you turn into your problem. Asdfghjkl !!!!!!!

Selalunya orang yang kita perlukan jauh dari kita, yes. I knew someone that is really know me and I've never pretending in front of her but she's so far away from me right now and I'm missing her 😭😭😭 

Aku bukan tak ikhlas dalam nak dengar problem kawan aku, but kalau kau beria ria cerita dekat kawan kau masalah kau and they don't listen to you, what do you feel ? Sometimes they think that you doesn't have any bad feeling for someone. 

Goodnite 🌙